A Christmas to Remember
by Iudicium
Summary: Nothing seems to help Joey and Seto get together, until Ryou makes a plan one Christmas. This is a Seto/Joey. Shounen ai. Rated it R just in case...
1. Ryou has hatched a plan

A Christmas to Remember

Warning: He's just a boy, and I'm a student / Can I make it anymore obvious? / I have no money / Please don't sue me / O yea / Rated R (Sing to S8ter boi MUAHAHAHAHA) This is rated R because of mucho yaoi! ~ ^_^ ~ Heh heh heh heh heh. I'm evil. Lot's of Seto/Joey...Yes, I use the English names, too lazy to change them. Joey does not have an accent! I hate the accent! The accent can burn in H3LL!

Disclaimer: All Yu-gi Oh © Characters belong to the brilliant genius who made them. (If anyone tells me, then I'll put who…^_^;) If I owned any of them…O the possibilities…Seto…Joey…*drool*…O yeah, the title has **nothing** to do with "A Walk to Remember ©," it just popped in my head. Please don't steal my baby!!!

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"Please Bakura-kun," pleaded Ryou. He really needed Bakura's help in order for his Christmas scheme to work. Deciding to add a bit more charm, Ryou made his eyes as big as possible (Bambi style baby! ^_~).

"Dammit Baka-chan, I hate it when you do this…" Bakura said while closing his eyes. Although the thought of the sweet Ryou was making him turn into Jell-O (yummy orange flavor Jell-o that I love so much!), Bakura would never admit that he was beginning to develop a little weakness named Ryou. "Fine, I'll help you, but I won't enjoy it!" Sticking out his tongue, Bakura absently said under his breath, "You know the eyes always work…"

"What?"

"Nothing!"

'Jeez, what got into him…' Ryou thought, oblivious to the slow blush spreading across Bakura's face. But the idea of Bakura's help pushed confused thoughts away, giving way to thoughts of a very merry Christmas for two certain hard-headed friends. If you could call them friends…

~*~*~*~

"Dumb Mutt, get out of my way!" The infamous CEO yelled. He had an important meeting to attend and this damn puppy wouldn't stop blocking the exit of the classroom. Kaiba Corp. depended of this meeting's decision in order to determine if the corporation would allow longer vacations and larger retirement fund for its employees. 'Why do I even go to school? I'm a freaking genius!' Seto thought, getting angrier by the minute. His cool composure was losing to the anger inside. He didn't know why, but that puppy had that effect on him.

Joey turned around to face a furious Seto. "What the hell is your problem? You can walk around can't you?" Joey replied. He didn't see why Seto always got so angry at him. It seemed that whenever the CEO was around Joey, he would blow up for no reason. It was slowly breaking his heart, not that he'd ever admit it to the glacier.

"I would but you huge posterior won't let me pass! But, let me put it in words you would understand, You're butt is too big!"

That hurt… a lot…but it didn't stop Joey from lunging forward for an attack. Sidestepping the feeble attack, Seto walked past Joey to the now clear door.

"You big jerk, I'll get you later!" Shouted Joey as he was being restrained by Honda (Hah! A Japanese name, sorry I really hate Tristan, what the hell is a Tristan?). "Do I really have a big butt?" Joey said softly under his breath.

Sighing, the whole group decided to head over to the game shop, but no one saw the mysterious gleam in Ryou's eyes.

~*~*~*~

"Umm, Joey, can I talk to you?" Ryou said timidly on the way to the Game Turtle (or whatever that damn this is called!) This part of the plan was crucial. If this didn't work, then his plan would fall apart. "Only for a second," Ryou smiled, 'this is sure to work.' Ryou started walking to Ueno park (Seishirou sama and Subaru kun sitting in the sakura tree, K I S S I N G!!!).

"Yea sure, whatever," Joey quickly agreed, he had nothing else to do, besides contemplate why Seto would be angry with him. His butt wasn't that big, was it?

As they made their way to the park, Bakura could be seen, slowly coming up behind the two friends.

"So Ryou, what did you want to talk about?" Joey asked

"Oh, I just wanted to know what your feelings for Seto are." Replied Ryou.

"What?!?!? Don't go there! I do not like him. I can even list the reasons out for you! One, he's a cold hearted bastard. Two, he's a big snob. Three, he has that sadistic look to him. Four … I can't really think of anything, so yea…" counting his fingers, "three reasons why nobody would ever love that bastard!"

"Joey, have you ever heard of that river in Egypt called De Nile (Totally off topic, but if someone asks you a question like this one, isn't it a lose-lose situation? I mean if you think about it, agreeing would be saying yes which is bad, I'm assuming, and saying 'no' will just trigger the whole Denial thing! And now back to the story!)?"

"What the hell are you trying to say?!?!? That I'm secretly in love with that bastard, but I won't admit it cause I'm too scared?!?" Joey started to yell.

"Well…yea… Would you please tell me, I promise I won't tell a soul" Ryou set his eyes to maximum bambi power. Joey didn't stand a chance…

"YeaIkindathinki'mactuallyfallinginlovewiththatcoldheartedbastardeventhoughiwon'tadmitittoanyoneandifyouspeakonewordofthisthaniwillkillyouandnoonewilleverfindyourremainsandBakurawillbereallysad!" Joey quickly muttered, turning beet read after his quick, but all revealing confession. Sure, he didn't know when it had happened, but ever since their first duel, he had slowly been growing a small affection that turned into love. At first, he had shrugged it off as rivalry, but now it was a whole different story. Imagine that, Joey falling in love with the one person who hated him. The irony made him laugh at night before crying himself to sleep.

"Good, that's all I wanted to know!" laughed Ryou, as Bakura knocked Joey out with some sleeping gas (so sue me, I don't know what they use to knock out people).

"There I did it, now what?" asked Bakura

"You'll see, but let's get him to our house first!" Ryou giggled (This is so Ryou…).

"Mou, tell me or else his dead body is going to get frost bitten in the snow, cause I'm not carrying this heavy body back to the house!" snarled Bakura, his patience was wearing thin, and Joey actually threatened his sweet prince, that's right, HIS.

"No, it's a secret and please, I'll give you anything you want! I just want to make them happy for once in their life! You know that both Seto and Joey have had abusive fathers in the past." Cried Ryou.

"Fine," grumbled Bakura, the possibilities were delightful, his aibou did say anything, but what was this whole secret? 

'What is my baka-chan thinking? I only hope it doesn't screw up Joey's and Seto's life too badly.' Thought Bakura. While loading the little puppy into the car (Yes they can drive, or they'd be carrying around a limp body.)

~*~*~*~

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA, It's finally the end of chapter one! This is my first fic so be nice, or else…:D (Isn't that happy face cute?!?!?) But seriously folks, creative criticism will be tolerated, though ignored :D I just checked the word count, and I found out that this chapter is really short….only like 1,200 words or something, and that's with all the disclaimer and miscellaneous comments that I keep on adding. sigh 

So tune in next time and Ryou will finally reveal his plan, because I will have finally came up with one…heh heh heh…:D


	2. YugiBurger

A Christmas to Remember

Hey minna san, I can't believe I got so many reviews already (yea, so what if 6 reviews don't compare to like the millions those other fics have, they're still my babies =D) Yay, I love these reviews. Many thanks! OMG, I made so many typos (correction, so far only one)…in my miscellaneous comments. L very uncool… Okay! Time for chapter two!

Disclaimer: This story belongs to the wonderful person who made it, and being typical of a fangirl, "If I owned Yu-gi Oh, then Joey and Seto would **always** be in bed doing scandalous things because I said so." =D There is shounen ai, and undecided yaoi, so if you somehow got here without noticing the blatant hints of guy/guy relationships, you're probably blind or just plain baka…-_-;

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"Okay! I want in, what is the big plan?" shouted an angry Bakura. Aside from all the strange looks people kept giving them for carrying a "dead" boy, on the way home, Bakura had to carry the fat ass dog (sorry couldn't resist) all the way upstairs. After several tries and a few expletives later, Bakura had managed to get the puppy on Ryou's and his bed, that's right, **their** bed.

"Well, if you must know, I'm going to get Joey and Seto together! I figure we can wrap up Joey in a big box, you know, that box the new television came in, and put it out in front of Seto's mansion!" giggled Ryou, he was so excited! This is what friends were for, getting bakas (I know this isn't a grammatically correct "baka," but I don't care) to fall in love. "So Bakura chan, what do you think?" Ryou asked, giving his love those bambi eyes.

"It's a wonderful plan, little hikari chan!" exclaimed Bakura, those bambi eyes were potent things. "Too bad that Yugi and his friends have heard your plan and are stealing Joey from our room right now."

"What do you mean? We're on the second floor, how could they possibly get in and out without us noticing?" asked a confused little hikari who was looking around for the slumbering dog that was missing from the bed.

"Well, I think it was right while you were saying, '… get Joey and Seto together!'. I saw that pharaoh brat climb in with Honda and Anzu and escape down the tree." Answered a composed Bakura. Now that that little puppy was off their bed, he could finally ask his little hikari a question he had.

"Well, why didn't you stop them?"

"Because I have something more important to talk to you about." 

"Oro?"

~*~*~*~

"The nerve of Ryou and Bakura, trying to get my best friend hooked up with Seto, without us!" growled an angry Honda (Civic…J/K). If there was anybody making those two bakas get together, by golly, it was going to be him! Goodness, everyone knew about them, it was pretty obvious to see the longing way they gazed at each other.

"Honda, remember Ryou was doing this out of friendship!" said Anzu, quieting Honda.

"Yea Honda, it was for Joey's own good!" said Yugi, with that cute little face he makes when he's all into friendship (heh heh heh cuteness attack!).

"I know, I know, it's just that he didn't have to make it such a secret! I mean, we're all friends, so we should help each other." Sighed Honda, who could resist Yugi's little display of kawaiiness?

"That's right Honda, but how do we know that Seto is good enough for Joey?" asked a curious Yugi.

"I know, we can use the "Test of Friendship!" Anzu yelled! The test of friendship was soooo much fun (did you know in "The Eternal Duelist Soul," Ryou actually goes, "It's soooo fun" or something, kawaii!).

"Yea, that's right Anzu, but what is the "Test of Friendship!" asked a confused Yugi.

"Well, it's a series of tests that each of us will conduct in order to find out if Seto is a true friend or not!" answered Anzu. She knew what she was going to do, make Seto sit through an hour of her infamous "friendship speech," then give him a pop quiz on friendship! "MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Oro? Anzu, why are you laughing?" asked Yugi.

"Oh, no reason, just thought of something funny."

"Well, I know what I'm going to do, I'm going to challenge Seto to a game of Duel Monsters!" Yugi told everyone. That sounded like a fair way to see if Seto was a friend. He could see if Seto abided by the rules!

"I know what I'm going to do, I'm going to challenge him to a few rounds of arm wrestling!" answered an enthusiastic Honda. If Seto was a good friend, then he had to be able to protect his friends!

"What are you going to do Anzu?" asked Yugi.

"That's a secret Yugi!" answered Anzu. If Seto was going to be a friend, then he'd have to be able to stand long periods of torture.

"Well, I'm going to go see if Seto actually loves Joey."

"Who said that?" squeaked a shaking Yugi.

"It is I, Lucifer, King of Hell, here to claim your soul! Just Kidding, it's me little one, Yami," said the calm voice of Yami.

"Eek, Yami! I thought it was some monster going to eat me and Honda and Anzu up, and I was soooo scared! I was going to be a little Yugi-Burger!" cried Yugi.

"Aibou, you know I didn't mean it! Come here, I'll take you home. Afterwards we can call Seto and see if he really loves Joey." Yami said, hugging the little boy.

Soon the whole group moved towards the Kame Shop (HAHAHAHHA I think that's the name of the stupid game store!), thinking of more torture, well tests of friendship, for Seto.

~*~*~*~

"Ugh, I'm so bored! What the hell was that meeting about anyway?" thought an angry Seto. God, it was just one complaint after another, damn what a boring day. Although the conversation with the mutt had been pretty damn funny. Joey did have a very nice ass if you looked at it, which Seto did often. He couldn't help it if that little blond puppy had somehow made it into his heart.

It looked like the meeting was about to end. With a quick nod, the corporate executives were dismissed from the meeting room, and Seto finally had sweet, sweet freedom. Opting to take the stairs, Seto soon made it down to his limo, soon relaxing into the soft seats as the driver took him home.

~*~*~*~

"So Yami, how will we be sure if Seto really loves Joey?" asked an inquisitive Yugi.

"We challenge him to a game of truth and dare!" declared an overly excited Yami. Seto stood no chance against the charms of Yugi, or the King of games, himself. Seto was going to be trapped. :D

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

Goodness, finally done with another chapter of this story! Sorry for the wait, if you could call it that, but school is torture, and my SAT1 class is deciding to beat my ass. Sigh, if only I were like Seto, I could just fly through all these things without studying. It's so nice to be a genius! Sorry for the lameness of the conversation between Anzu, Honda, and Yugi, but some evil dubbers came into my house and decided to tamper with my fic (God, I hate how they make Joey and Honda say the stupidest things, it makes me want to throw a freaking Japanese dictionary through the Television screen)! Boo hoo hoo!!!!!

So Folks, stay tuned to the fic in order to see how truth and dare will turn out, what that whole question thing with Ryou and Bakura is going to turn out, and to see if Joey will ever wake up from all that "sleeping gas." Dude, that thing must be really potent if Joey will sleep through all this…-_-;


	3. Seto's Laboratory

A Christmas to Remember: Chapter 3

Disclaimer and Warning: See Chapter 1 (the horrible rendition of "Skater Boi" by Avril)

Notes: Sorry to any Tristans out there if you were offended by my "Tristan" ranting. I'm just mad that the WB can not accept some Japanese names. I guess they didn't want people to think Honda was a car. LOL! 

Also many a sorry for people who have waited since February, I didn't realize how long ago I had written. But to make it up to you, from now till the end of September, I'll try to update every week! After that, I have to concentrate on College Applications. GOMEN NASAI!!! 

Hmm, finished SAT1's. I got a good score! BOOYAH ELITE (my SAT tutor place)!!! So there I was, sitting there perfectly happy with my score, when my tutor says, "This is a very good score, but you should be slightly disappointed that you didn't get higher." -____________________________- how evil! 

Oh man, it's my senior year, I hope I get into a good college! YIKES! Too much pressure! O well, I'll continue to write! LOL

Thank you for the reviews! I'm too scared to read them though… O_o

Please Enjoy Kudasai! ::bows politely::

*~*~*~*

"Ahh, this is the life," cried Seto, as he lay down on his bed in his favorite "Joey" boxers. His room was filled with posters and pictures of nice golden retrievers. He was watching the television, or rather the tape that was playing on the television. It was one of Seto's "spy" tapes of the little puppy (If Seto is a gazillionaire, he can stalk whoever he damn well pleases, in my opinion). In this particular tape, Joey was bending over while taking a nice, warm……… pizza out of the oven! "Oh yea baby, that's what your master wants!" exclaimed Seto, when the doorbell rang. 'Shizzle!' thought Seto, as he quickly pressed a button on the wall. Suddenly, everything changed from bright and golden to blue and icy. The posters of golden retrievers changed into posters of the blue eyes white dragon vaporizing some poor fool. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

'Who the hell is at the door? And how the hell did they get past the guards?' thought a thoroughly shocked Seto. Unbeknownst to him, two spiky haired duelists were out to get him, or rather the truth out of him.

*~*~*

"Heh, that was easy!" laughed Yugi as he skipped down the yellow brick road.

"Yes, surprisingly the guards were easy to subdue with your cuteness!" chuckled Yami, the MIGHTY PHAROAH!

"Who knew that a simple look could make all the men spontaneously combust?" (I:Ooo, Ooo, Pick me! Pick me!!! Y: Umm, ok I: I did!) asked Yugi, looking totally innocent! ^_^

"Yea, that was some pretty messed-up stuff, but we must concentrate at the task at hand!" Yami stated while knocking on the door.

"Oh yea, how do we make Seto play truth and dare with us? Hmm Seto's not answering the door…"

  
"Well, I don't think he'll be able to resist a rematch at duel monsters…" Yami said after ringing the doorbell.

"DID SOMEBODY SAY REMATCH!?!?!?!" yelled an excited (no, not in that way!) Seto. Here was his chance to get his reputation back! "I mean, what are you doing here Yami?" said Seto coolly.

"I'm here to challenge you to a duel, but not just any duel! I challenge you to a "truth and dare" duel!" exclaimed the excited Pharaoh! 'Heh heh heh,' thought Yami, 'I'm going to have a little…_fun_ with Seto before we find out the truth!' "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

"Yugi, is something wrong with Yami?"

"Umm… -_-; …"

"Well, let's get this part…I mean duel started!" exclaimed the high (as in druggie kind) pharaoh.

*~*~*~*

(In Seto's … ummm … room? -_-; It obviously has a dueling arena… -_-; ok…wishful thinking…)

"Ok Seto, I place down Kuriboh in attack mode!" Yami stated.

'Oh man, that Kuriboh thing is ugly and nasty! Yami always beats me with it! AHHH!!! I must kill it' thought Seto, as he lay down a nice trap card called mirror force and put a blue eyes white dragon in attack mode. "Blue eyes white dragon, Super lightning blast of furious rage! Kill that Kuriboh!"

"Not so fast Seto, I activate my trap card, Anzu, the obsessive friendship stalker. She will chase your dragon until it dies from too many speeches of friendship."

"An Anzu card? O_O"

"I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship, I love friendship," yelled the little Anzu cartoon. The Blue eyes promptly blew up from all the friendship crap.

"O_O, damn, your turn Yami," Seto said, well aware that he still had "mirror force" in play.

"Go Yami!" shouted Yugi, because it wasn't Yugi who was playing, but Yami.

"MUAHAHAHA, I play harpie's feather duster, which destroys all you magic and trap cards. Now I play multiply which makes a hugemongous number of kuribohs. Well, enough kuribohs to totally fill his whole half of the dueling arena. (Those kuribohs kind of remind me of pokemon. They're kind of cute in a way, but deadly in large numbers!) Now, I place the card, "United We Stand," which increases Kuriboh's attack points to 1 zillion! (a rough estimate…) HAHAHAHA, now attack my emissary of darkness."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, damn that freakin furball on drugs!" cried Seto as the last of his life points faded to oblivion!

"Hahahahaha Seto, now you have to suffer the consequences of losing!" said Yami. "OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHO (Naga the white serpent style! Heh heh, slayers…soooooo funny!)

'Damn freakin furball, should've freakin killed it while I still had a freakin chance. Heh heh heh, I'll create a freakin nice game where you shoot the freakin furry freak from hell. Heh heh heh, freakin furry devil, I will get my freakin revenge. Nobody gets the best of Seto Kaiba, NO ONEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!' thought Seto, while his mind subconsciously directed him to grunt, "hn…"

"Ok Seto, truth or dare?"

"I choose…dare"

"Try again…"

  
"What the freak, you can't make me decide which to choose!"

"Yes I can," Yami said, while golden eye appeared on his forehead.

"Yes you can." (Hey, Seto should be traumatized by the shadow realm! Right?)

"Ok, truth…"

"Do you like like Jou-kun?" asked Yami.

Seto's heart skipped a beat. "Of course not, who could love that makeinu? He is beneath me! I would rather die than be seen with him," Seto quickly answered.

Suddenly…

"OOO, what does this button do?" asked Yugi, pushing the button which had turned the CEO's room into its current state.

Another suddenly…

"Did you lie Seto," asked Yami, who was currently gawking at all the pictures of the golden retrievers.

"Umm, maybe?"

"=D, no one is allowed to lie to the Pharaoh. Now, as punishment, you must tell Jou by the full moon of this month. =D" said Yami, who was now breathing normally.

'Damn Yugi, GET OUT OF MY LABORATO…ROOM!!!!!!"

*~*~*~*

WOW, another chapter after how many months? TOO MANY TO COUNT! O_O AHHHHHH~! =D please forgive me. I will try to write more chapters, but I'm kind of doing this impromptu like! I go with my creative juices.

Heh heh heh,

Ja!

-Iudicium


End file.
